We spent the 16th-18th of June, 2005 at the Caliente Resort. It was our first visit and we were rather impressed with the facilities and the variety of activities available. Our visit coincided with the Florida Association of Nude Recreation (FANR) convention so there were a few activities associated with this group that do not normally take place.

We had reserved one of the motel rooms for our stay. They also have casitas, 1-2 bedroom condos, and 3 bedroom villas. We drove from Tampa International Airport, which takes 30-40 minutes. We arrived around 1:00 PM at the staffed gate and our name was checked against the reservation list. The friendly staff member directed us to the clubhouse to register. Check in time is officially 4:00 PM but our room was ready so we completed a number of forms and had to show a picture ID and soon had room key and guest passes in hand. We were told to get settled and then come back for a tour of the grounds if we would like one. The motel is located close to the clubhouse so we deposited our bags in the room and returned to the desk. Roseanne took us on a tour of the facilities and explained the activities, food & beverage service, hours of operation, etc. We returned to our room to shed our clothes, grab our towels and we were back at the main pool with a drink in our hands in no time. Note: the resort does not provide beach towels so bring your own.

Facilities
Our room was pretty much a typical motel room. It was very clean and everything appeared to be new. It had an in-room coffee pot with coffee, a dorm size refrigerator, a microwave, a TV, clock/radio, hair dryer, phone, small table with two chairs, two night stands, and a screened-in porch on the back side which looks out into the grounds. The rooms also have a mirror on the ceiling above the bed. I thought this was novel and was feeling rather studley that first night until I noticed the small print in the corner: “Objects in mirror appear larger than actual size.”

You enter the compound through the clubhouse. As you enter, the registration desk is on the right. Beyond the desk to the right is the Fiesta Night Club. The night club is good size with a large bar and a big dance floor. The dance floor is surrounded by tables which are set behind a railing. There are lots of seats at the four-sided bar and there are also tables in this area. The dance floor is in a palapa type room with a tall ceiling. There is an excellent sound system and on one wall there is a large screen onto which are projected the videos which accompany the music. There is a small stage in front of the screen. Some people climbed up on it during the evening dancing. The music was provided by a DJ/VJ while we were there.

To the left of the night club is the piano bar. This was a popular après-pool gathering place. This is where the resort holds its happy hours, get acquainted gatherings, etc. People also stop here for a drink before dinner. The piano player plays for several hours although not every day. At these late afternoon/early evening times here it was common to see people nude, sarong only, in casual dress, and in sexy dress. Directly behind the piano bar you can walk out onto the large veranda which has tables with umbrellas. This area looks down over the main pool.

Next to the piano bar is Café Ole’, the resort restaurant. We had breakfast and dinner here. Again, in the restaurant, people dressed in the various manners as described above. We figured about a third were nude, a third were casually dressed, and a third wore sexy club wear or lingerie. It was suggested to us that we make reservations. The first night we didn’t and had no trouble getting a table around 7:00 PM. The next night we did make reservations for the same time but it was obvious that we did not need to as there were plenty of tables. In fact, the piano bar was busier than the restaurant at this time. The food was excellent. Monday – Thursday they have a couple of specials priced at $10.00. These are a real bargain. On Friday the special prices go up to $20.00 for the weekend. The menu is extensive with entrees ranging from $15.00 - $29.00. The desserts are huge. The restaurant opens for breakfast until 11:00 AM then closes until dinner is served.

Beyond the restaurant is the Calypso Sports Bar. It is just like a regular sports bar with TV screens on all the walls. There is a large four-sided island bar with stools. There are also tables and you can sit outside on the patio if you like and look down on the main pool area. Pub food is served here and it is open until 10:00 PM.

Head downstairs and you first see the gift shop/boutique that sells all the resort essentials plus an array of clothing with the Caliente logo. Nearby is the aerobics room for those who can get up early enough to make it to aerobics class. Next to that is the fitness center with a large number of exercise machines, free weights, tread mills, stair climbers, etc. Next door is the locker room and a sauna & steam room. The spa is in this area as well. The spa offers massages, pedicures, manicures, etc. Out the doors and to the right is the Grotto Bar which serves the east side of the main pool.


Clubhouse entrance

Outside is the main pool. This is a large pool with two islands and the waterfall. Chaise lounges ring the pool and there are several thatched stands a bit farther back. There are also thatched stands with tables for lunch. Lunch and drinks are served from the Beach Bar on the west side of the pool. The main pool seems to be the center attraction. It is the only pool that is not heated. This was a relief because the temps were in the 90’s while we were there. There were several cheapo floats lying around for anyone to use. Some folks had obviously brought their own floats. If you go, you might want to bring along a couple of the cheap floats. Near the Beach Bar is a white sandy beach that overlooks a pond. There are chairs on the beach and it is a quiet, private area. Going in the water however, is prohibited due to the probability of coming into contact with alligators. Nearby is an outdoor stage which hosts live bands at times.

Up behind the waterfall is the hot tub and a conversation pool. The conversation pool is a narrow “S” shaped pool with a bench along the walls in the water. There are also tables with umbrellas in this area. We were told that this is an adults only area – no kids allowed.

On the opposite end of the main pool are two side-by-side water volleyball pools. In this area are also located the tennis courts, and two sand volleyball courts, horse shoe pits, a children’s play ground, shuffleboard, and restrooms with outdoor showers.

Security
As mentioned above, you’ve got to go through a staffed gate to get into the resort. When you check in you are issued a guest pass. You are told to keep this with you at all times while on the grounds. Each time we entered the clubhouse we were asked to show our pass at the door. As for security in our room, there was no deadbolt or any kind of secondary lock. There was no in-room safe. In general however, the resort had a very safe feel about it.

Children
Caliente is advertised as a family resort, though there are areas where children are not allowed, such as the night club. During our stay we saw several very small children in the main pool area. This was mid-week. There may be more kids on weekends.

Cash/Tipping
At check-in they tell you that Caliente is a cashless resort. Everything is charged to your room via your guest pass. Waitresses take your orders around the pool for drinks and food. If you go up to the bar, they ask for your guest pass. We had neglected to ask about tipping when we checked in. Around the pool we saw some folks grab a couple of dollars when they went to the bar. Some tipped the waitresses when they delivered their order, others did not. My guess is that tipping is not expected in these situations but is appreciated and accepted when offered. On the other hand, our housekeeper left an envelope on our table with “I appreciate tips” written across it. Each time we offered a tip it was gladly accepted.

At the restaurants you actually receive a slip much like when you pay with a credit card. The slip has a place to write in a tip.

Costs
As for costs, the drinks were $5.00 - $8.00 as far as we can tell. Your bill when you check out is not itemized. It just says “Food & Beverage” with the cost. The restaurant costs were mentioned earlier. The pub grub is moderately priced. Our motel room was $100 per night weekdays/ $125 weekend and we found ourselves spending about $100 per day in food and drink. Beware that you are a captive audience once you walk through the clubhouse doors. No food or drink is allowed through the clubhouse and it is the only way in. There is a sign stating this policy and that all bags are subject to search. There is no chance of buying a six pack and thinking that you will pour yourself a cold one by the pool. Anything you bring on premises will have to be consumed in your room.

Service
Overall, the service was good. The waitresses came through the pool area frequently. They and the bartenders were very friendly. The service in the restaurants was equally good. We did not experience any long waits for anything. Whenever we were leaving the clubhouse we were asked if we needed a ride. They have several golf carts to ferry people around the compound as some of the accommodations are quite a distance away.

Activities
The resort puts on a number of activities during the day. At check-in we received the weekly schedule which was broken down to the activities slated for each day. These consisted of aerobics classes, water yoga, volleyball, happy hour (half price drinks), Ladies Night (free wine, beer, well drinks), piano bar, karaoke, etc. On the weekends and at other times there is live music at the pool. Fridays are “Naughty Night Fridays” with a theme. This week it was a western theme. There were some really sexy western outfits in the night club. The night club is a lot of fun with the big dance floor and the nice sound system. The public is actually welcomed at the night club. We saw a Caliente ad in a local paper for the public. The ad noted, “Nudity not required in the night club.” It was our observation that a number of people who were not guests came for the dancing and sexy atmosphere. Again, people were in all the various stages of dress and undress with a more than fair share of sexy lingerie. While sitting at the bar one evening the bartender poured a shot, then removed her top, bent over backwards on the bar with the shot squeezed between her breasts for the guy on the next stool to chug. It’s that kind of atmosphere.

Conclusion
Caliente is certainly worth the trip. The place is clean and well kept. The atmosphere is relaxed during the day and heats up considerably in the evening. The people we met were very friendly (as most nekked folks usually are). It should be checked out if you are looking for a nice, upscale nude experience without having to leave the country. We think it would be a great place to go with your significant other or with a group of fun loving friends. Feel free to write us with any questions.

Dennis & Cindy